There's Subtext, and There's
by Phil D. Hernandez
Summary: Xena's love life takes a few unusual twists.


THERE'S SUBTEXT, AND THERE'S  
**by Phil D. Hernández**

GENRES: _Xena: Warrior Princess,_ romance, slash ( is a fancy disguise). **VIOLENCE:** None. **SEX:** Xena attempts to seduce Gabrielle. Some lesbian sex also occurs behind the scenes. **LANGUAGE:** Clean. **RATING:** R, but given the nature of the subject, you still have to be 18 to read this story in most of the United States. **SUBTEXT: **Did you skip to this line? Go back and start with the title again. This story features lesbian characters. **SPOILERS:** If the Shoe Fits. **NOTICE TO JOXERPHOBES:** I have included your least favorite character in this story in part to cause certain alleged members of the Xenaverse to avoid reading it. Ha-HA!

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DRAMATIS PERSONAE:  
Xena Warrior Princess  
Gabrielle the Bard of Poteidaia, Queen of the Amazons, Xena's best friend  
Joxer the Mighty, would-be hero  
Lila Gabrielle's sister

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This story was written during the week between the first airings of Between the Lines and The Way. I chose not to alter the story after the latter aired, and so there will be numerous discrepancies with the broadcast Xenaverse (for instance, Gabrielle kept her staff and is not wearing her India clothing).  
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Three friends were strolling leisurely along the road from Olynthus to Poteidaia. Two of them, a short, young strawberry blonde and a somewhat taller dark-haired man, were engaged in an animated conversation concerning pine nuts. It would seem he preferred them roasted in the shell, while she shelled them raw and used them in sauces and stews. Both punctuated their words with wildly waving arms, which caused the man to continually duck, as the woman carried a long Amazon staff in her right hand. Once or twice, she accidentally struck him, but he shrugged it off. He was used to it.  
The third person was a tall, dark warrior woman, who shook her head and smiled at the argument. It was likely she would get those pine nuts in both forms, but right now, she had a hunger of a different sort. This kind of hunger only the blonde could satisfy, and not with her cooking, either.  
The tall woman stopped suddenly and turned around. Hey, Joxer, she addressed the man.  
  
I think I forgot something back in Olynthus. She made a pretense of rummaging through her gear. Yep, I forgot the emery. Tartarus!  
Emery? What do you need that for? the shorter woman asked.  
You know, Gabrielle, to polish my chakram.  
But you don't – The tall woman clapped a hand over Gabrielle's mouth. Joxer, eager to volunteer, missed the significance of the gesture. I'll get some for you, Xena! he cried.  
All right, Joxer, why don't you go back to Olynthus and pick some up? Gabrielle and I will wait for you, Xena agreed.  
Before Gabrielle could squirm out of Xena's grip, he sped off toward the town they had left. Instead of running after him, however, the bard squared off in front of her best friend.  
That was probably the most transparent ruse to get rid of Joxer I've ever heard, she griped. What is wrong with you, anyway?  
For her reply, Xena took Gabrielle by the arm and led her away from the road. I have a confession to make, she told her. Quite possibly a long confession, and since Joxer is the only person I know who can get lost on a straight stretch of road, I figure it'll be at least a couple of hours before he gets back, and we'll still make it to Poteidaia before dark.  
Xena, you didn't answer my question. And why do you have to send Joxer away to make a confession? Is it something he wouldn't understand? That covers a lot of territory, I know, but you trust him.  
Not with this. Gently the Warrior Princess sat Gabrielle down in the shade of an oak tree, then joined her. Now Gabrielle was certain something was wrong. There was a space between the two women, an inch or two at most, but a distinct and carefully planned space. Usually, Xena and Gabrielle were so intimate that they never noticed how physically close they were. Gabrielle thought Xena was afraid to touch her, and said so, lightly stroking the warrior's bare upper arm.  
Uncharacteristically, Xena flinched. You're right, Gabrielle. You seeI'm attracted to you.  
Gabrielle looked directly into Xena's steel-blue eyes, uncomprehending.  
Physically, Gabrielle.  
The bard stifled her first impulse, which was to laugh. Xena was utterly serious, she knew. Gabrielle was well acquainted with women who preferred other women as sexual partners, not just by reputation like Sappho, but directly, as queen of the Amazons. Among the latter, such an orientation was not unusual. Almost unconsciously, Gabrielle nodded.  
Then you understand, Xena said, and fleetingly fingered the powerful muscles just below Gabrielle's left shoulder. I love you, Gabrielle. The bard began to tingle all over as the warrior's feathery touch proceeded down her arms. Gently, always gently, Xena rubbed her fingers against those of her friend.  
Gabrielle did not know what to make of the situation. Xena was beautiful and strong, intelligent, firm and yetoh, so gentle. There was a light in her eyes, love and anticipation and desire all in one. Her lips were slightly parted in a smile born of pure joy. Now the Warrior Princess reached around with her other hand and stroked Gabrielle's neck just behind her ear, softly teasing the earlobe in the process.  
Xena was soGabrielle couldn't put words to emotions she hadn't felt since her wedding night. But Perdicas never touched her quite the way Xena was touching herwell, maybe. Yielding to her friend's caresses, she found herself engulfed in a flurry of soft kisses as Xena hungrily sought her red lips, her firm mouth –  
_JOXER!  
That_ was what Xena's touch felt like. Gabrielle rarely gave Joxer a chance to get intimate with her – it almost always took some sort of spell – but he was always that gentle in those rare instances. Unlike a lot of the rest of him, there was no pretense. Xena wasn't pretending, either, butJoxer never pushed himself on her, as a lover, anyway. Xena was used to getting what she wanted.  
_She wants me,_ Gabrielle knew.  
The soft fog lifted from her mind, and she saw Xena staring sadly at her, a hand that had been questing now lying quiescent on Gabrielle's bare thigh between the knee and the hem of her skirt.  
You don't feel the same way, Xena said. I'm sorry.  
The bard finally found her voice. It's all right, Xena, just She placed her hand over Xena's. You certainly know how to please a woman.  
Not completely.  
No. There's something missing. I'm not sure whatit's not as if I have a lot of experienceonly the one night with Perdicas. My body's humming like a well-tuned lute, and I have a craving between –  
That's physical desire, Xena replied. If there were more than that, you'd be all over me right now.  
It couldn't hurt to try. With that, Gabrielle seized Xena and planted a tremendous kiss on her, tongues dancing in an intricate ballet. The bard's touch was equally gentle as she stroked Xena's shouldersmuch lower. Xena was ready to tear their clothes off and take her friend on the spot.  
By mutual unspoken agreement, they broke off.  
That wasbut you're right, Gabrielle. Something is missing. I guessin this lifetimewe're not lovers.  
I guess not. I still love you, Xena. Though tears fell freely from her eyes, she still managed a sisterly hug and kiss.  
I still love you, Gabrielle. With the same gentle hand as before, she wiped the bard's tears away. Gabrielle stood, giving her most beloved friend a wistful smile.  
Why _now,_ Xena, after all these years?  
I just couldn't hold it in any longer. It was hardwe're so close and you're very beautiful, Gabrielle, not just your body but your mind and soul. For a long time, you weren't ready for love, and I blamed myself. I figured it was about time you opened your heart again, so I decided to take the chance. Now it looks like I made a mistake.  
Gabrielle hugged Xena again. The mistake was in not telling me sooner, but now it's out in the open where it belongs. I need a little time to sort this out, okay? Why don't you wait for Joxer and come get me when he shows up? Don't worry. Nothing's really changed.  
_Nothing's changed, yet everything's changed,_ Xena knew.

*****

Gabrielle sensed him before she saw him, or even heard him.  
I don't want to talk to you, Joxer.  
That's not what Xena said, he told her.  
Xena looks out for me far too much. I'm fine.  
No, you're not, he denied. Even I can see that. You're not the kind of woman who turns her friends away. Look, if you want to talk about it, I'm here. He sat down next to her, but she shrank away. If you don't want to talk about it, I'm still here.  
An angry frown creased her face as she gripped her staff. Her anger was not directed at her clumsy friend, however.  
Just what did Xena tell you? she demanded.  
Nothing. Just that you were sitting by yourself too long, and you could use a friend right now. She wouldn't tell me why she thought I could do a better job of it than she can.  
Gabrielle carefully placed her staff on the ground again.  
Okay. You can sit with me. Just keep quiet, and don't touch me.  
Joxer wanted to offer her his hand to hold, but prudently chose not to do so. Gabrielle removed her boots, tucked her legs into lotus position, raised her arms slightly and began to meditate. Left with nothing to do, Joxer focused on her knees, the smoothness of the skin, the well-defined muscles above and below. She sat in utter stillness, barely seeming to breathe. Almost unconsciously, his own breathing fell into a slow, regular rhythm.  
Some minutes later, Joxer started in fear. For just a moment, he could have sworn, those perfect knees had been tinged blue, with the texture and veining of stone. Then the moment was over and Gabrielle opened her eyes.  
_ That's one Tartarus of a dangerous technique, but it works,_ she reassured herself.  
Lowering her arms, she turned to her friend, and she was smiling at him.  
You love me, don't you, Joxer? she asked, almost literally out of the blue.  
uh, wellI couldn't exactly sayit's more of aI wouldn't call it He was badly frightened, not knowing how she would react, and expecting the worst – until Gabrielle reached over and took his hand.  
She shook her head in wonder, but kept smiling. I guess it wasn't as ridiculous an idea as I thought, she said. I should have known.  
Aw, Gabby, you haven't had time for love. There was that trouble with Xena, then Dahak, and your spiritual journey and all, and II wasput yourself in my place.  
No, thanks! she laughed, with a merry twinkle in her eyes that made him smile, too. But I understand. You were afraid. You thought I'd laugh at you, or get so angry it would break our friendship.  
Or you would break my neck. Remember the necklace I gave you?  
She nodded. I still have it. Then her hand flew to her mouth in shock. You were trying to tell me you love me!  
That's when I knew you weren't ready. Frankly, Gabby, I'm not ready, either. You've grown; I really haven't.  
In many ways, you have, Gabrielle disagreed. One sign that a man is growing is when he asks for help instead of imitating the people he admires – uh, will you stop trying to fold your legs like mine? She smoothly disengaged her legs from the lotus position and drew her knees up. Joxer abandoned his efforts and unconsciously matched the new pose. Gabrielle put a hand on her forehead in mock exasperation.  
Okay. Here's what I meant. Just before I left for India, we met Princess Alesia and I had you continue a story I started.  
He hung his head, ashamed. Yeah. She hated it so much, she ran away from me and almost died.  
Gabrielle cupped his chin in smooth fingers and raised it. The point is, Joxer, each one of us who told the story invested her own thoughts and feelings into it. So for Aphrodite, I was Tyrella the hag, but for Xena, she herself was Tyrella the lone warrior woman. I handed off the story before I got to the prince – who would have had to have been you. The bard said this last in a very small voice.  
I should have realized something, she continued, when you made me the princess. You were right about me not being ready for love. Anyway, when you told the story, it's true you weren't very good, but you kept repeating something. It was a cry for help. You want social skills. You want to be less silly and goofy so I can see the real you inside.  
Joxer leaned back and propped himself on one elbow. I'm still asking, he said sadly. If you aren't too busy.  
The bard shook her head, lips pressed together, eyes squeezed shut in apology. No, I'm not busy, she replied, and the smile crept back into her face.  
he said quietly. There's something else I've seen in you since you came back from India. You have a kind of inner strength. Xena has it, too, in a different way. Maybe, if there's something like that inside of me  
Nodding in agreement, Gabrielle placed a hand on his shoulder. Joxer, you have to understand that none of this is going to be easy. I won't cut you much slack, and Xena won't cut you any at all. You can't run away or hide in a fantasy or whine all the time because you're not learning as fast as you like.  
I understand. A new look came into his eyes, one that lightened Gabrielle's heart considerably.  
_He loves me, all right._ She decided that she liked it, after all. _Even more than that, he wants me to be his friend and to let him be mine. Why not? He deserves it, after all we've been through together. But I need to be straight with him.  
_ You also have to accept that I'm not in love with you, Joxer, and I may never fall in love with you. So don't try to impress me. Being yourself is impressive enough.  
All right, he agreed with only a hint of reluctance, as long as I get a fair chance to win your heart.  
That's reasonable. They clasped hands on it.  
As the bard replaced her boots and laced them, Joxer grew thoughtful. Gabrielle, I'd still like to help with whatever was bothering you.  
Your being there helped a lot. I'm feeling much better now. You have a right to know what happened when you were off on that phony errand.  
Xena apologized for that. It serves me right. I should have realized we could get anything we needed once we reached Poteidaia.  
Brace yourself. Xena ditched you so she could have time to make a pass at me.  
By the gods! Are you all right?  
Yeah. We tried to make love, Xena and I. All I could think about was Perdicas – and you. I just hope I didn't hurt Xena too badly when I turned her down.  
Me, too. I'm used to it; she isn't. It always hurts a little, though.  
Joxer, what would you have done if I said she _had_ seduced me? Gabrielle asked out of curiosity.  
Cried a lot, he replied honestly. Then I'd pick up the pieces and keep going. Say, suppose she seduces both of us?  
Gabrielle, taking this seriously, screwed up her face in thought. You don't really think she would? She considered it further. she concluded. But if she did, I'll bet you'd have the time of your life!  
He chuckled and stood, offering Gabrielle a hand to assist her up, which she accepted. She continued to hold his hand as they walked over to collect Xena and resume the journey to Poteidaia.  
_Nothing's changed, yet everything's changed,_ Gabrielle realized.

*****

They found the Warrior Princess sitting on a rock beside the road, idly flinging her chakram at various targets and morosely catching it on its return. She looked up at her friends with a wan smile, then raised an eyebrow.  
I meditated for a while, Gabrielle told her. I'm okay with this. You're still the same Xena.  
Xena glanced at the bard's hand, which still grasped Joxer's.  
Oh, that. Gabrielle let him go. I finally figured out that Joxer loves me. You knew, too. That's why you sent him to me, right? Thanks.  
Gabby's gonna help me with my social skills, he announced.  
That's good, Joxer, Xena replied, a shade more brightly.   
No, Gabby doesn't love me, he answered the unspoken question,   
_That should prove interesting,_ Xena thought. Are you sure you're all right, Gabrielle?  
The bard smiled and tossed her head. Yes, Xena. I told you, I meditated.  
You weren't using Aiden's techniques again, were you?  
Sure. Why not? It was perfectly safe. My legs started to stiffen, and I felt Joxer give a little gasp inside, so I pulled myself out of it.  
Xena's eyes narrowed. _She felt Joxer? Curiouser and curiouser._ I honestly don't think you should be doing that, Gabrielle. If you go all the way, how do I explain to people that you're the decoration on your own tomb?  
Gabrielle sensed that this was genuine concern, not overprotectiveness. I promise not to do it unless you're with me, or Joxer is. Okay? Xena was unmoved. _  
_ Xena grudgingly conceded.  
Xena, you are _not_ all right, Gabrielle declared. I know it hurts. The hurt goes away. You can't tell me you don't have any other lovers out there.  
They say a sailor's got a girl in every port. I've been a sailor, Gabrielle. I've been with some of the Amazons, too. A man like Borias is good for raw, naked lust, but for real lovemaking it takes a woman. A very tender, special woman.  
And you think I'm as tender and special as they come, don't you, Xena? I'll have to take your word for it; I'm my own worst critic, she observed.   
It's just who you are, Gabrielle. I feel the touch of your love every moment of every day. I knew the touch of your body, your entire body, would be right for me. I thought it would be right for you, too, seeing how close we are. I was wrong. A tear trickled from one eye.  
Gabrielle reached out with her finger and wiped the tear away. She kissed the finger, then Xena's cheek.  
It's the one thing I can't give you, Xena. Anything else that might help, I'll do for you.  
I feel useless, Joxer said sadly, but if I can help  
The Warrior Princess was now weeping openly. I'll be sure to ask. She reached out with powerful arms and pulled her two best friends close to her. I mean that. Between the two of you, I'll come out of this just fine.  
She let them go and dried her tears. I think it's time we got back on the road. Knowing you, Gabrielle, I'm sure you don't want to be late for supper!

*****

Lila greeted her sister at the doorstep of their parents' home. Like Gabrielle, she wasn't very tall, but she had the same infectious smile and seemingly inexhaustible energy. Just a little younger than her sister, Lila had dark hair. Her infrequent letters kept the bard posted on doings in Poteidaia.  
Mother and Father are in town. We weren't expecting you, but we can always throw some more food in the pot. Lila contemplated her sister. A _lot_ more food, she decided. You look like you lost weight, Gab.  
Just the usual exercise, the bard replied. Chasing warlords, running from warlords, squirming away from warlords who have knives at my throat, bashing warlords with my staff  
Lila laughed. Okay, Gabby, I get the drift. Why don't you get Joxer settled in, and Xena can help me get things together.  
That sounded strange to Gabrielle, but she shrugged and got out some of the spare bedding. There was a small alcove where the bard used to sit and practice her letters when she was a little girl, and she installed Joxer there, putting his pack on a convenient shelf. Joxer helped Gabrielle bring her bag and Xena's to Lila's room, where there were two beds; one used to be Gabrielle's.  
Returning to the main room, Gabrielle checked the simmering pots, then sat with Joxer and chatted about his first visit to Poteidaia. Leaving out the trouble with Hope and the Destroyer, she went over some of the things that happened before she herself had returned. She had wondered why her father liked Joxer, and soon she understood. Her friend had been much less clumsy and foolish than usual. _More like a man,_ she thought. _In that light, he must have reminded Father of Perdicas.  
_ After some time, Gabrielle realized something was wrong.  
Lila and Xena haven't come back yet. We'd better go look for them, Joxer.  
The two women weren't in the yard or the root cellar. That left the barn. Approaching cautiously, Gabrielle discovered the barn door had been barred from the inside. Faint sounds, just below the threshold of clarity, came from behind the door.  
_Oh, no. Someone please tell me this is not happening. Not with my sister! Not after this morning!  
_ Putting her ear to the door, she was able to discern what Xena said next:  
Oh, Lila. You are a naughty girl. Gabrielle is going to miss us, and we're both going to be in big trouble. Get your clothes on.  
It's worth it, Xena. Every time is worth it. Lila replied.  
Scant minutes later, Xena opened the barn door and discovered Gabrielle, staff at the ready, fire in her eyes.  
My_ SISTER, _Xena? I turn you down, so you seduce my sister? How _could _you?  
Xena started to reply, but Lila forestalled her. No, Gabby, she didn't seduce me. I invited her.  
__ Gabrielle was dumbfounded.  
It's true, Lila said. It was after Xena saved my life from Hope. I know you weren't there, but you know how strong Xena is.  
Xena told me about the bridge, Gabrielle agreed.   
Well, the next morning, after you guys took care of the monster, you remember you went into town with Mother and Father and showed Joxer around?  
  
Xena was still pretty well banged up. I brought some salve, and one touch led to another  
I know that touch. But you  
Come on, Gabby, you know Father hasn't even tried to arrange a match for me. Joxer's cute; I can see how Father likes him, but there isn't a man in the known world who can satisfy my needs. Then Xena came along. I know I'll never be more than a substitute for you, and here she held out her hand, which the Warrior Princess took, but I'll accept whatever she is willing to give me.  
The bard stared at her sister, head cocked, face blank. Then she cracked a smile. You said you were a sailor, Xena, and Poteidaia _is_ a port. All right. Do Mother and Father know?  
They suspect something, Lila replied, but no one talks about it. I haven't found a lover here yet. I didn't tell them because Father is angry enough with Xena as it is. I don't think he could handle the idea of Xena and me making love. At least you listen to reason.  
Gabrielle lowered her staff. After Xena went for me today, I'm not sure what reason is.  
Now it was Lila's turn to be surprised. Xena, you made a play for Gab? I could have told you she's straighter than a spear made by Hephaestus. I suppose you had to try, though.  
I'm sorry if we hurt you, Gabrielle, Xena said.  
No, I'm not hurt, and I won't have to meditate my way out of this one. We still need to get things ready for supper. If we stay out here any longer, Joxer may want to check what's cooking. Gabrielle had peremptorily ordered Joxer back into the house even before the barn door had been unbarred. _Then_ I would be hurt, or at least sick to my stomach!  
Thanks, Gabrielle, for understanding. Xena hugged her most beloved friend, then stepped back to let Lila at her.  
I guess Xena will be in your bed tonight, the bard told her sister. Try not to make a lot of noise, will you? I need to sleep sometime.

**********  
**THE END  
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Disclaimer:  
Gabrielle's sexual orientation (whatever you may believe it to be) was not harmed during the writing of this story.

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Episode references:  
Return of Callisto, The Quill is Mightier A Family Affair, In Sickness and in Hell, If the Shoe Fits, Paradise Found and Between the Lines.

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Other references:  
_Alice in Wonderland._

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Author's note:  
The episode Between the Lines demonstrated that there really are no limits to how one can conceive the relationship between Xena and Gabrielle. It can assume _any_ form, and so those who believe that the _only_ romantic relationship between them is the lesbian one have limited horizons indeed. It is time the Xenaverse stopped kowtowing to this segment of fandom, which in many cases is linked to my other pet peeve, Joxerphobia. We need to accept and** _encourage_ **other viewpoints besides our own, as long as these are not harmful (we do not need S & M stories, for instance). This includes the lesbian viewpoint, which is quite reasonable; I simply object to its becoming dogma. There is plenty of room in the Xenaverse for the entire range from full homosexuality of the characters to full heterosexuality, for Joxer lovers and Joxer haters, those who reject the third season and those who accept it (we won't mention the fourth seasonoh Gabrielle, oh lost!), and all the other variations one can imagine. Whenever someone seeks to close off the Xenaverse or a major part of it to fans who do not follow the party line (Joxerphobes being the worst offenders), we are all diminished.  
What does this have to do with the story? As most readers know, my specialty is romantic fiction linking Gabrielle and Joxer. I happen to find such stories extremely challenging, because developing Joxer into a viable person and love interest for Gabrielle is a delicate and intricate process. At the same time, it is merely one way to look at things. From time to time, I work on stories, so I don't limit my horizons. (This one happens to be a Gabrielle and Joxer romance; my other material, both published and unpublished, is not.) Some while back, while responding to a survey, I idly tossed out some other possibilities, including what if one of [Xena and Gabrielle] is a lesbian but the other isn't? After I saw Between the Lines, I decided I would try my hand at answering my own question.  
The other side of the coin remains: what if Gabrielle is a lesbian but Xena isn't?

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COPYRIGHT NOTICE:  
_Xena: Warrior Princess,_ Xena, Gabrielle, Joxer, Lila and all other characters who have appeared in the series, together with the names, titles and backstory, are the sole copyright property of MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. No infringement of copyrights or trademarks is intended in the writing of this fan fiction. This story is copyright © 1999 by Philip D. Hernández and is his sole property along with the story idea. This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies of this story may be made for private use only and must include all disclaimers and copyright notices.

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Comments:  
Unless your sole purpose is to bash Joxer or Ted Raimi, your comments would be greatly appreciated. You can e-mail the author at **BroadwayPhil@yahoo.com** .

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More stories:  
Additional stories can be found at the author's website,_ The Subtlety of Pickett's Charge,_ at **** .


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